Okay, for all you sensitive people, I do not mean to offend anyone. This post is for comedy purposes.
1. Honking
The first thing I noticed when we drove the car to my aunt's apartment in Shanghai was that there was SO MUCH DARN HONKING. Like, we'd be driving, and someone would just like randomly honk. And then another honk. And another honk, until the road is this extravagant honking orchestra of cars. Really, people. Just because someone cuts in front of you does NOT mean you can pound your hand against the wheel. But I guess the people are just used to it, because when our cousins were visiting us in Atlanta, they struck up a surprising conversation:
Cousin: It's so quiet here.
Me: What? We're in the middle of Boulevard. How can it be so quiet?
Cousin: I don't know. It doesn't sound like ducks.
Me: ...
Truth be told: People in Shanghai honk because they just like it.
2.Smoking
I don't know anything about statistics, but I can guess that a third of Chinese people smoke. Now, the smell of smoke makes me nauseous, and I always tell my dad for my family to STOP SMOKING, he always retorts back, "It's their CULTURE, you can't tell them to stop." I guess I can't, but its really annoying because at the most unconvenient times they would just pull out a cigarette and start smoking. You know, China should really start using those graphical images on the cigarette boxes, because, really, people are dying of lung cancer.
3. Scooters
A long time ago, my father always told me that, because China's streets were so crowded, that they would use bikes to get around. But I guess that bikes were too slow for the people of modern China, so they began using scooters and motorcycles. I mean, half the road would be cars, and the other half would be scooters. To an extent, they would also be kinda annoying, such as when you are driving and suddenly, a pink scooter would just cut in front of you and weave through a bunch of other cars, and it scares the crap out of you. Like, POP, there goes a scooter!
4. Cleaning
No one ever categorizes cleaning among people. But observe carefully, and you just may start doing that. Take Chinese people. I've noticed that when they clean, they basically just push everything against a wall. It's funny in a way, just piling everything against the wall and consider the newly cleared floor "clean". For example, the same cousin:
Me: Your aunt (my mom) needs you to clean your bedroom before you leave.
Cousin: Okay!
(looks at her stuff and pushes it against a wall)
Cousin: All clean!
Me: Sure...I guess.
5. Commercials
Chinese commercials are so plain FUNNY because they are so RIDICULOUS. I mean, I just watched a commercial on television, and it was about those sweeper things. And the ladies were RACING with them to see which was the fastest. Obviously, the winner would be the star of the commercial. It's so STUPID and HILARIOUS. I watched another one, which was about this GoGo box drink or something, and it was supposed to be all romantic and stuff, except for the fact that both of the people were holding the bright yellow box drink with splashy blue Chinese letters on it, even in like these fancy restaurants. I guess they are trying to say that you will get a date by drinking GoGo box drinks or something.
1. Honking
The first thing I noticed when we drove the car to my aunt's apartment in Shanghai was that there was SO MUCH DARN HONKING. Like, we'd be driving, and someone would just like randomly honk. And then another honk. And another honk, until the road is this extravagant honking orchestra of cars. Really, people. Just because someone cuts in front of you does NOT mean you can pound your hand against the wheel. But I guess the people are just used to it, because when our cousins were visiting us in Atlanta, they struck up a surprising conversation:
Cousin: It's so quiet here.
Me: What? We're in the middle of Boulevard. How can it be so quiet?
Cousin: I don't know. It doesn't sound like ducks.
Me: ...
Truth be told: People in Shanghai honk because they just like it.
2.Smoking
I don't know anything about statistics, but I can guess that a third of Chinese people smoke. Now, the smell of smoke makes me nauseous, and I always tell my dad for my family to STOP SMOKING, he always retorts back, "It's their CULTURE, you can't tell them to stop." I guess I can't, but its really annoying because at the most unconvenient times they would just pull out a cigarette and start smoking. You know, China should really start using those graphical images on the cigarette boxes, because, really, people are dying of lung cancer.
3. Scooters
A long time ago, my father always told me that, because China's streets were so crowded, that they would use bikes to get around. But I guess that bikes were too slow for the people of modern China, so they began using scooters and motorcycles. I mean, half the road would be cars, and the other half would be scooters. To an extent, they would also be kinda annoying, such as when you are driving and suddenly, a pink scooter would just cut in front of you and weave through a bunch of other cars, and it scares the crap out of you. Like, POP, there goes a scooter!
4. Cleaning
No one ever categorizes cleaning among people. But observe carefully, and you just may start doing that. Take Chinese people. I've noticed that when they clean, they basically just push everything against a wall. It's funny in a way, just piling everything against the wall and consider the newly cleared floor "clean". For example, the same cousin:
Me: Your aunt (my mom) needs you to clean your bedroom before you leave.
Cousin: Okay!
(looks at her stuff and pushes it against a wall)
Cousin: All clean!
Me: Sure...I guess.
5. Commercials
Chinese commercials are so plain FUNNY because they are so RIDICULOUS. I mean, I just watched a commercial on television, and it was about those sweeper things. And the ladies were RACING with them to see which was the fastest. Obviously, the winner would be the star of the commercial. It's so STUPID and HILARIOUS. I watched another one, which was about this GoGo box drink or something, and it was supposed to be all romantic and stuff, except for the fact that both of the people were holding the bright yellow box drink with splashy blue Chinese letters on it, even in like these fancy restaurants. I guess they are trying to say that you will get a date by drinking GoGo box drinks or something.
There was a lot of smoking in Spain too... I'd kind of glance at them contemptuously and hold my breath.
ReplyDeletePop goes the scooter!
Your posts are so awesome, Alex... I wish I had a GoGo box. Those things seem really weird.
Why, you want a date or something? :)
ReplyDelete